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RE: [IPk] DAFNE courses in the UK: free foods?

Marion, in that particular case you did the right thing! Clearly her
partner's mother doesn't know much about health matters: pre-eclampsia can
kill. She should be on her knees thanking you for potentially saving her
grandchild's life and the life of the child's mother.


-----Original Message-----
From: email @ redacted [mailto:email @ redacted] On Behalf
Of Marion Malik
Sent: 26 June 2006 12:11
To: email @ redacted
Subject: RE: [IPk] DAFNE courses in the UK: free foods?

Hi Pat,

Totally agree that no one should sit back and in an ideal world wouldn't it
be nice if we could share thoughts without others taking offence just take
the comments as intended.

I have a friend who recently had a baby at 26 weeks, we went to the London
marathon together as my husband ran for the second year (supporting Cancer
research and diabetes UK) anyway this friend was quite off colour, she
looked ghastly and didn't know at the time she was pregnant.  When we all
said goodbye I insisted that her boyfriend get her checked out as she was
delaying blood tests.  Two weeks later we find she was suffering from pre
eclampsia (bad spelling) , when I asked a few questions I was later told
that I was referred to a nosey busy body (similar words) by her partners
Mother and it was clear from the conversation that she thought the same.

I have rightly or wrongly decided that sometimes it just isn't worth
offering your view or opinions. I find it very sad as I, personally am happy
to share and listen, hence why I am here.



-----Original Message-----
From: email @ redacted [mailto:email @ redacted] On Behalf
Of Pat Reynolds
Sent: 23 June 2006 19:34
To: email @ redacted
Subject: Re: [IPk] DAFNE courses in the UK: free foods?

In message <email @ redacted
>, Marion Malik <email @ redacted> writes
>You did well to bite your lip; I am getting better at it.

I am obviously in a contentious mood tonight (when aren't I!).  Why is
it a good thing to remain silent when you see someone through negligence
or attempt (potentially) harming others?

Answers could be:
* self-protection
* it would do more harm to show the 'expert' up, as the others present
might ignore *good* advice on the basis that they can't be trusted

Wouldn't it be great if there was some way of supporting these mistaken
people in their learning, in a gentle, non-threatening way?

And don't mention the misguided friend .... I was going to say 'at least
they don't harm others', but by their actions and statements, they
influence other people, too.  It's just a lot more challenging to tell
them that you think they are harming themselves (or worse, their

So we need a 'what a friend wouldn't tell you' service, too.


Pat Reynolds
email @ redacted
   "It might look a bit messy now, 
                    but just you come back in 500 years time" 
   (T. Pratchett)
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