Re: [IPp] RE: Advice for 3 year old
Everyone is probably sick of hearing from me, but I wanted to respond to
Debbie's email. We have struggled with similar issues with our
daughters. At the end of the day, I have come to the conclusion that we
must provide our children choices and then enforce the consequences.
I mostly agree with Debbie. I think we must be firm with our kids and we
should expect them to do all possible to maintain their health. I think,
however, that there ARE choices in treatment methods with diabetes,
unlike some other illnesses. MDI is an acceptable way to manage diabetes
if a person chooses that route. Our daughter had great HbAlcs on her
shots. We followed her meal plan and schedule EXACTLY (which was cause
for friction with our daughter). We chose a pump for lifestyle issues
and we hoped it might make managing diabetes easier when she got to those
fun teenage years. But if Andrea chooses another way, I think that is
okay. As long as she maintains the best control she can and takes
responsibility for the choice, I think that should be sufficient.
Obviously a young child is not going to be fully responsible for
maintaining control, but I think they should still get some choices. If
one chooses shots, one chooses to eat at a certain time and to only eat a
certain amount or to have extra shots. That is where I would say you
can't give. That is where I think you need to be firm with your kids.
If a child chooses to go back to MDI, you must enforce strictly the
I am glad someone believes in being a firm parent. I believe that
myself. I just think that diabetes is hard enough on kids and that we
should let them have some say in their treatment. Once they make that
choice, the consequences of that choice follow and must be upheld.
I think a parent has to choose carefully his/her battles. I agree with
Debbie that we can't let children rule the roost, but children also need
the opportunity to make choices so they can experience the consequences
and learn to choose well. I agree with other parents that a pump
vacation will give Justin the chance to see the difference between MDI
and pump therapy. He will most likely choose his pump!
Good luck, Gina. Thanks, Debbie, for very good food for thought.
Mom to Andrea 4 (dx 1/28/03, pumping Cozmo 10/2/03),
Alicia 2, and Carlos 6 months
Married to Tom for over 7 fabulous years
Salt Lake City, UT
On Thu, 4 Dec 2003 15:49:55 -0500 "Melvin & Debbie Crawford"
<email @ redacted> writes:
> I know I am going to be in the minority here but what ever happened
> to good
> 'ole being firm with your child? I know he is 3 and doesn't
> But if you give in on this one, then every time he gets upset and
> doesn't go his way in life, he will think he can whine and get his
> way. I'm
> sorry but life is very difficult and I think having diabetes at a
> age teaches them to accept it. I think we as parents are too easy
> on our
> kids today.
> Now before you go and want to jump down my throat. (this is for
> reading) please know that my son was just 6 when he was diagnosed.
> We sat
> on the kitchen floor the night we came home from the hospital and
> together when I had to poke and repoke his finger to get a
> sufficient amount
> of blood on the strip. I know how horrible it is, but you can't let
> a 3
> year old, 6 year old, etc.. call the shots. (no pun intended).
> I would explain in a firm, yet loving way that this condition,
> whatever you want to call it, is not going away and we are dealing
> with it
> in the easiest way possible. The thing is, think about it, what if
> he had
> cancer or some other terrible thing that you couldn't give him a
> over and he HAD to take chemo or had to have transplants,
> etc... You wouldn't think twice about putting your foot down and not
> him a choice. Why allow him to have his way with this? If you are
> now, I believe he will be stronger later when he may, on his own,
> want to
> rebel and forget testing, bolusing, etc....
> I don't know, again, I know it's unpopular these days when everyone
> letting their children "rule the roost". But that's my two cents,
> for what
> it's worth.
> Debbie Crawford
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