From: email @ redacted [mailto:email @ redacted]
Sent: Saturday, September 13, 2003 4:13 PM
To: Sandy Winkowski; email @ redacted; email @ redacted;
Michele Floyd; email @ redacted; email @ redacted; email @ redacted;
email @ redacted; email @ redacted; email @ redacted
Subject: And GOD created....
And God Created.....
God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with
broccoli and cauliflower, spinach, and green, yellow, and red vegetables of
kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
Then, using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's and Krispy
Kreme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" and Man
said, "Yea," and Woman said, "and another one with sprinkles." And they
gained 10-20 pounds.
And God created the healthy yogurt that woman might keep the figure that
man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat,
and sugar from the cane, and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to
So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented
Thousand-Island Dressing and garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman
unfastened their belts following the repast.
God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in
which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken
fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained more weight
and his cholesterol went through the roof.
God then brought forth running shoes so that his children might lose
those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man
not have to get up to change the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and
cried before the flickering light and gained pounds.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with
nutrition. And Satan peeled off the healthful skin, sliced the starchy
center into chips and deep-fried them. And man gained pounds. God then
gave lean beef so that man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy
appetite. And Satan created the 99-cent cheeseburger. Then he said, "You
want fries with that?" And Man replied, "Yeah! And super size 'em." And
Satan said, "It is good."
And Man went into cardiac arrest. God sighed and created quadruple bypass
Then Satan created HMOs.
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