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[IP] RE: contradictins, or is it really that bad
Date: Fri, 27 Sep 2002 08:56:57 -0700
From: "Jacqui Hall" <email @ redacted>
Subject: Re: [IP] Re: contradictions, or is it really that bad
>You are correct, there are some cancers that are curable or go into
>but there are some that aren't as well. I had a high school friend >that
>diagnosed with cancer, wasn't even treatable, spread throughout his >body
>died 6 months after diagnoses. I would much rather be diagnosed with >a
>disease like diabetes then one like aids where you pretty much know >that
>you are going to die and most aids deaths are not very pleasant.
First of all, just a point of information and a little HIV education: This
is not a contest! No one wants to have HIV any more than anyone wants to
have diabetes. But not everyone who gets HIV "is going to die" any more than
each person in the universe is going to die. Like with diabetes, there are
treatments available with which many many people with HIV live long happy
years and do not develope AIDS. Like people with diabetes, people with HIV
have to take care of themselves in a way that people without it do not. Like
people with HIV, people with diabetes have to do things to maintain their
health that most people never think about.
But people with HIV can forget about it now and then (as long as they
remember to take their meds on time), those of us with diabetes must be
aware of it on some level 24/7/365.
This need to be constantly aware has become a habit for me but uses energy
I'd rather put to better uses and is, for me, one of the big negatives about
living with diabetes.
>Instead of having such a negative attitude against something that is >going
>to be with us for the rest of our lives but something that we >do have some
>sort of control over,
True for some of us some of the time. There are those of us who work very
hard at and have good control over our bgs and STILL have horrendous and
life threatening complications.
>we should have a positive attitude and learn to live with it and >accept
That is fine for you at this time. That does not make it fine for ALL of us.
It is essential to remember that YMMV (your mileage may vary).
>There are so many worse things in life that can happen, for starters, >we
>could've died instead of being diagnosed with diabetes, we could >have been
>a vegetable or lost all movement of our bodies and have to >spend the rest
>of lives in a wheel chair that we control via our >mouth or one arm which
>is the only arm that moves.
Because there are things that you consider worse than diabetes does not make
it a fact for all of us. And again, it is not a contest....my disease is
worse than your disease thinking. Please respect our individual differences.
Many people have serious medical problems caused by their diabetes. And just
because others might have worse problems does not negate the seriousness of
an individual's problems.
>I have one child and one on the way and I know that their chances for
>getting diabetes is a little higher, but it's not like 100% higher or
> >anything and I am prepared if they do by the unfortunate chance, get
> >diabetes because I have lived with it and gone through so many things >so
>I will be able to provide support for them as well.
And if their feelings and attitudes and problems are negative and/or
different than yours.....will you still be able to support them in a way
that will be helpful to them where they are at that specific time?
>We all need to wake up and look at our attitude and change it. We >have to
>think, okay, I have diabetes (or so and so has diabetes) and >we have to
>live it with and deal with it, we can't change that, so am >I going to have
>a negative attitude towards it, feel sorry for myself >and let it effect my
>disease, my life and my children for the rest of >my life, or am I going to
>accept it, deal with it and say okay, I >have diabetes but I am going to
>control it the best that I can and >pray that things go well?
I do not feel that I need to wake up and look at and change my attitude. I
have a condition that most people do not have. I work hard every day to
control it as well as I possibly can. There are times that I get very very
tired of working so hard at it. Though my bgs are far from always perfect,
I do a very good job at keeping them within reason. My A1c has run in the
mid-5%s (without many lows and (knock on wood) none that require help from
others since I started pumping. I am determined to live as "normal"
(whatever that is) a life as I can. There is very little, if anything, that
I personally would do if I didn't have D. that I don't do now. I am an
active contributing member of society.
BUT! This is not easy. Diabetes is difficult. Many things that my peers do
without a second thought take a lot of planning and work for me. I make a
zillion more decisions a day than those without D. do. I've lost the freedom
to be as spontaneous as I would be if I didn't have diabetes, I (we) have to
always be aware of what I am eating and my level of activity. I (we) deal
with infusion sets, ordering supplies, sticking fingers with a sharp
instrument several times (12ish) per day, avoid walking barefoot (difficult
for ME, I love bare feet), worry about potential infections every time I get
a cut or am exposed to anyone with a contagious disease, the ability to get
insurance, the ability to avoid complications or deal with them when they
occur, maintain my health and continue to work, etc. I could continue for
much longer, but will stop here because I'm sure you get my point.
These issues are all part of my life. I could just stick my head in the sand
and ignore them, but I am a realist, so I don't.
I'm very fortunat that most days are great and I am happy and feel both
physically and emotionally healthy. But there are times that diabetes
presents me with some difficult issues to deal with. Sometimes I might HATE
diabetes with a passion. I might be angry that this is the hand I was dealt.
I might just be sick to death of the constant struggle with things that come
so easily for others (like eating a pizza without struggling with how to
deal with it insulin-wise). I might feel down/depressed. These might not be
earth shattering matters, but they are real feelings that are not always
positive. Sometimes they are very negative. If I cannot come to this list
with my negative feelings about diabetes because list members feel that I
SHOULD have a positive attitude about diabetes........well, I'll just quit
this list because I will need it most when I am having a problem and need
Sorry for rambling on for so long, but I (obviously) feel very strongly
about this. :-)
I hope you are always able to keep your attitude positive when you are
dealing with diabetes (and the rest of your life), but if you're ever
struggling with D. and feeling down, I would like you to be able to come
here and get support. For many of us it really is that bad, at least
sometimes. Even if you never need that........please please understand that
others do. Just telling someone to have a positive attitude is not helpful
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