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[IP] parents of children with diabetes

IF you are a parent who fears their child's future OR feel sad about
your limitations as a parent of a child with IDDM...PLEASE QUIT!  IF
your depressed...get some help...share your emotions with this
list...BUT be aware that your feelng's can be limiting to your child!  
IDDM is only a portion of your child...NOT the whole child!  Look at
your child as one who has Diabetes and NOT one who IS DIABETIC.  It is
an attitude.  IF you look at your child as Diabetic and you HATE
diabetes...how is this attitude going to affect the child?   

Your child has IDDM...your child is NOT IDDM.

Your emotions are normal...knowone wishes harm upon those they love...

I am thankful I NEVER knew as a child that it made my Mother physically
ill each morning when she had to give me the Insulin shot!

So...please be careful...allow your child with IDDM to feel normal!

Becky LaSpina 

becky-- amen, amen, and a thousand more AMEN!!!!! as the child with D in the end of the
parent/child with d equation, i have to add my two cents. the parental posts have been
heart-wrenching, and so what i have to say will make me sound like an insensitive clod (esp since
i am only 21 and not a parent)...

PLEASE stop tormenting yourself with your child's diabetes. i am sure that it rips your heart out
to watch your child go through this, but it is LIFE for us, and we have to live it as best as we
can.  we can't *afford* to torture ourselves with this the way some parents do, because we have to
get on with the business of living. if you think your heart breaks when you watch your child go
through this, imagine what a child feels when he sees his mother cry and knows that it is because
of him that she is crying! you have no idea how many times i, as a depressed diabetic teenager,
wished that i were dead because of all the anguish my parents went through over their "defective"
child (that's what i called myself, and i am sure i am not the only child w/D who has done so).
when you go on and on about all that your child will miss, and how he or she could die, it does
not make either your child OR any of the diabetics on this list feel any better. yes, it's a
terrible thing. yes, we could die. we know, we know, for goodness sake we KNOW already. we won't
*ever* forget it, and neither children nor adults with diabetes need to be reminded of all the
awful direnesses by the non-diabetics of this world.  if you are constantly expressing your hate
for diabetes in the presence of your child, it will make the child feel bad about herself. like it
or not, diabetes is a part of who i am, and i cannot express hatred for a part of my own self.  

if at all possible, take a break from your child's diabetes. teach him/her how to self-manage, if
it's appropriate. do NOT micromanage your child's every move, and allow him/her to begin taking
responsibility for him/herself. it will do both you and your child a world of good. if you can
find anything positive about your child's having diabetes, tell them. it *still* makes me feel
better, even now, about having D when someone compliments me on how well i take care of myself and
how health-conscious i am. your kids will appreciate hearing this, too.

i can't say enough how important Dcamp is for kids. it gives them a place to be the same as
everyone else, where the *non*-Ds are the different ones. it gives them a place to complain about
their loony parents, and about how they feel about D, without judgment. it's one of those
wrenching steps that a child takes away from his/her parents and towards being an independent

sorry for the rant, i don't mean it as a personal attack against any one of you. i have no kids
and so it is easy for me to be glib and just tell you all to get over it. i am sure that my karmic
revenge for all this will come upon me threefold and more once i have my first child. also i just
want to say right now that MY parents are the most awesome parents in the world.

becky =) (dx'd 1/24/92 at age 10, pumping since 11/21/01) 

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