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[IP] Re: a mom's anguish...vent

One of my initial thoughts after being dx was that I was happy it was me and
not one of my younger siblings.  I have always felt that it was better that
I have it myself than to see someone I love (especially someone that I've
cared for and been responsible for) to have it.  I was lucky to never have
to go through the "Why me?" question.  Why not me?  It is sort of like
playing the "What if?" game (what if I didn't check my bg when I did?  What
if I had left 10 minutes earlier and been involved in the car accident I'm
just driving past?).  I can drive myself crazy playing that game, but that
is about it.  I never can really accomplish anything by playing it.

I was dx when I was older (16), but even still, I can't think of my life as
being abnormal because of diabetes.  This is normal for me.  That is not
saying that I don't want a cure, but at the same time, for me: Maureen
Reagan that is 23 years old, lives by herself, works in the schools... also
includes having diabetes.  I wish I could have a vacation from it, but I
can't and I'm certianly not going to let diabetes stop me.  I really can't
even completely comprehend what it would be like to not have diabetes at
this point (although I would be more than happy to try to make that

With the tools you are teaching and giving Josh, he couldn't ask for better.
Feel free to vent anytime you need it.  I haven't had to walk in your shoes,
but I am more than willing to listen.

Maureen dx 10/94, pump 4/99
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