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Re: [IP] Am I Doing Everything Wrong? LONG


Wow! You have been through a lot of changes in such a
short time!  Give yourself credit for trying!  Now for

 I think that I've gotten to the crazy point about my
> blood sugar numbers. If the
> number is high, I get all stressed out, which only

I've been pumping for 2.5 years and I still have
highs. In my 15 years struggling with diabetes and
depression I've gone from 'needing' to have an insulin
reaction a day to feel successful to not testing
unless I thought I was low and being non-compliant to
(finally) accepting that the numbers aren't totally
under my control.  We have control over what we eat
and our activity and with a lot of work this can be
enough for some people.  Others (like me) living a
high stress life or battling emotional problems have
biological fluctuations in our metabolism that are
unpredictable.  This sounds like where you are.  Have
you considered seeing a therapist to help you (and
your wife) come to accept the diabetes and the impact
its having on your life?  If this is something you'd
like to try talk to your doctor, he should be able to
find someone with that kind of background experience.

You are NOT doing everything wrong, the sense of
failure is all wrapped up in perfectionism and

> For some reason, inserting the Tender has gotten to
> be a real problem. Last
> week, I inserted one and hit a blood vessel. Blood
> started backing up into the
> Tender, so I took it out and started over again. 

I did that once with a SoftSet...when I mentioned it
to my doctor he stated that its extremely rare and
difficult to do.  Leave it to me!  :}  You handled it
exactly right, and if you weren't having problems with
the Tenders before your technique isn't a
problem...RELAX!  If you were having problems
inserting before, talk to your CDE and doctor and have
them go through the technique until you're
comfortable.  Also consider changing to SoftSets which
don't require figuring an angle, they go straight

> being higher and me being more stressed. In an
> effort to keep my numbers down,
> and to avoid the hassle of carb counting foods that
> I don't know what to do
> with, I've pretty much stopped eating - on a good
> day, I'll have breakfast and
> lunch, on most days just breakfast.

Sometimes a lack of food can actually cause higher
sugars, if your metabolism is like mine.  When I
started carb counting I started giving into my lack of
appetite (due to the depression) and began only eating
enough carbs to get by, usually from the breads...I
completely did away with vegetables, protein and milk.
 I lost a lot of weight and had a lot of problems with
my bgs.  Now that my depression is better, I'm eating
better, and my bgs are much lower.  I don't understand
it but it works.

How comfortable are you with the exchange plan for
meals?  Try using the carb equiv. for exchanges rather
than the exact carb count for particular foods.  Its
less precise, but much better than not eating, and
you'll start learning carb counting gradually.

MOSTLY just hang in there.  If you aren't ready to
handle the pump go back to injections, but don't give
up due to the feelings of failure...It takes time to
balance life changes out!  And you aren't doing
anything "wrong" you're just trying to perfect the
techniques and that takes a lot of time!  It will get
better, try to relax and give yourself the credit you
deserve for facing this daily struggle!


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