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Re: [IP] cry for help.....(long)

i do not have any kids myself (yet), but i was diagnosed when i was 12 and
had a very hard time dealing with the change that i had to go through.  The
one thing that always bothered me most about my mother is that she would
always ask me (every day, three times a day for 12 years, ) if i tested my
blood, what was it, did i eat my fruit, did i take my shot... I love my
mother but she was the biggest pain in the behind.  And i know she was just
worried, but after 5 years it was enough.  I went through a stage in my life
when i didn't check my blood and i skipped shots all the time, at that time
my A1C was around 18.0.  I was in the hopital twice with DKA, which is when
i started to realize what i was doing to myself.  Now that i am married and
more responsible i have realized how important it is to myself, my husband,
and my future family to stay healthy and without complications for as long
as i can.
I would not suggest taking the pump away, because if you do then he will
just skip shots, at least this way you know he is getting some insulin.  I
don't know what kind of meter you have but maybe if you get a faster one
that will only take seconds to do, like the fasttake, he might feel just a
little more comfortable checking his blood.  Being 15 is hard enough and i
know how he feels having to deal with diabetes on top of it.  He is lucky
enough that he gets to go through his teen years with the pump, which should
make it alot easier than if he was on shots.  I don't know exactly what you
are going through, but i do wish you and your son all the best.  Just try to
be understanding, keep checking his machines to make sure he is testing and
taking at least some insulin.
Another thing that made me open my eyes is when i met my uncles mother who
had lost a couple of toes to diabetes, and another lady i met, now has lost
both of her legs to diabetes, i don't want to end up like that.  I'm not
saying take him to the hospital and show him what diabetes can do, but do
you know anyone who might have had some complications that can either show
or explain to him what can happen?

Good Luck
----- Original Message -----
From: <email @ redacted>
To: <email @ redacted>
Sent: Wednesday, October 04, 2000 10:41 AM
Subject: [IP] cry for help.....(long)

> Okay list.......I don't write too often, but do read everything & absorb
> the great information!
> I am needing help......
> First off, I want to say that I KNOW I am whining to this list, and I know
> some of you don't care to hear from whining mothers, so go ahead and
> now! I also know that the problems that I have with my son go deeper than
> just the diabetes, and yes, we are attending counseling.  I am being up
> and telling you this, because I am afraid that I am going to get a few
> reply's to this that slam my parenting techniques! I don't need to be
> anymore.........I have to deal with the fact, myself, that I am failing as
> mother. But what I really need now is some advice on dealing with the pump
> Justin! I don't mean to sound so harsh, I just don't need any "hate" mail
> today.......I am having a hard enough time with all this as it is!
> is a hard enough job......and then you add in a kid with special needs - I
> know some of you can relate to the pressures of that!
> My 15 year old son started pumping on Aug. 15th.  He has always had a very
> hard time dealing with the fact that he has diabetes. We have had a lot of
> denial problems in the past. Things have seemed to get out of hand lately.
> checked his meter last night, and things just didn't jive......numbers
> all too close together, too good of control for what we were used to.  My
> first thought was..."WOW, this pump is really working"!, but then I
> remembered what had happened in the past (Justin had used test solution
> testing).  I confronted him on it. He at first lied about it, but then
> down and said, YES, he was using test solution. He also figures out how to
> change the dates and times on his meter so that he could go back & do
> days worth of tests with test solution at a time. He hasn't actually
> his blood in over 2 weeks. He is completely guessing when doing his
> I did check the memory screen for the boluses, and he is giving himself
> boluses (unless he has figured out how to change that, too). He is 15, and
> try to let him take as much responsibility with his life as possible.
> Obviously we have given him too much of our trust? Do we need to take it
> back, and start checking his blood for him? Giving boluses for him?
> carbs for him? He isn't home all the time......should I ground him to the
> house for the next year? Home school him so that he is always here? And
> sports.....the one thing he LOVES - should I take that away as punishment?
> Not let him play on the school team? I can't help but think that that will
> make him hate his diabetes and his life that much more!
> I had him check his blood right then......346. Negative keytones.
> I Just don't get it.......He cares more about people seeing him test his
> blood, than he cares about his health?? He says that he doesn't want
> especially kids at school to see him. I suggested having him go to the
> station each time, and he said that he won't do that, either. He does not
> want to be "different". He says he just wants to be normal.   -  What
> is normal??  Is there anyone "normal"??  Everyone is different, in some
> or another.......but he doesn't understand that.  He wants this diabetes
> go away, but knows that it won;t.
> I guess what I am wondering is.....since he isn't taking care of himself,
> taking this pump and his health seriously, should I take the pump away? I
> don't know that that will really solve anything, because he just then will
> not do his injections.  At this point, I feel it is a lose-lose situation.
> We have involved his CDE, Endo, Ped, and mental health counselor......but
> really feel that none quite understand what he is feeling, and what we are
> going through.
> What can I do???  What should I do???  He tells us so often that he hates
> life.  What can I do???  I am so scared for what the future holds for
> I am very actively involved in a diabetes support group and am on the
> of JDF - I have alot of support, but still........
> Teresa  (mom to Justin - 15   dx'd 8/98, pumping since 8/15/00)
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> for HELP or to subscribe/unsubscribe, contact: HELP@insulin-pumpers.org
> send a DONATION http://www.Insulin-Pumpers.org/donate.shtml

for HELP or to subscribe/unsubscribe, contact: HELP@insulin-pumpers.org
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