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[IP] Insulin Reactions

I just read your web page which concludes, "If you have had a similar type of 
reaction or some other kind of experience during a reaction email it to me 
maybe we will share it with others. It doesnt matter how silly or serious, 
this is how we learn and teach." Because I have been wanting to write and 
share my diabetes experience I will do just that. 
Often I sense that some activity that is easy for me is now extreemly 
dificult. So dificult that I can't do the usualy simple activity of office 
work or phisical coordination. Once I stood by the window for hours at my 
friends house until my friend came home, told me it looked like I had a 
problem, "What are you doing?". To which I responded, "Thats right, I've got 
to eat something." Finaly making the mental connection.
I believe it is a requirement, diabetics must continuously monitor through 
quiet, thoughtful observation of how they are feeling and coping. For many 
years that was how I controlled my diabetes without testing sugar.
Even before diabetes as a pre-teen when I was woken up to do something I 
would jump out of bed fully alert racing off to whatever chore. After 
diabetes insulin reactions in the night awaken me and I race to the food. If 
I don't know where a fast acting food source is the insulin reaction will 
stick around for a while. Sometimes reactions are uncomfortable with the push 
of adrenaline. If not then I'm lulled into, "If I think long enough and rest 
my brain for a while the activity I am pursuing will become clear again."
My worst insulin reaction was on a high school camping trip. I was running 
out of Snikers bars, my chocolate wraped medicin kit in those days. My group 
decided we would climb the mountain and spend the night up there so a few of 
us would first go food shopping. I insisted but was not allowed on the food 
run. My request for candy bars was dishonored. They told me after the insulin 
reaction they hadn't known how serious my condition was. I did have squeeze 
tubes of jelly jam. I felt low blood sugar at bed time and I ate as much of 
the jelly, by itself as I could. That night in my mind we endured a blizzard 
with such bone numbing chill I marveled at my compatriots brawn for not 
crying out, fortifying our shelter or abandoning camp. I snuggled as close to 
the leader as I could, thinking the entire camp would soon be sardine packed 
for warmth. But oh the brawn, I was not allowed to draw warmth from those 
around me. I soon fell asleep and felt something on the side of my face like 
a spoon and in my mouth and people holding me. They said my eyes were open 
with a blank look. To one leader I had carefuly explained how to care for me 
in an emergency. So I started to say, "I told you what to do just in time." 
But first I asked, "Did you know what to do from our conversation last 
night?" He said no, we asked your twin sister what to do. She didn't know but 
she said maybe giving him sugar will bring him out of it. My single parent 
family had as much interest in diabetes as in moon rocks.

I fly to friends house. There's only time for a bowl of cereal for breakfast 
before second friend's wedding. I haven't eaten cold cereal in a decade 
because I feel sick after eating it. So I take a heavy insulin dose to cover 
it. Soon I get this constant "battling the insulin reaction", eating whatever 
I've got, ancious for enjoyable food to become available. I drive us over to 
the reception early to help set up. As soon as my friend says, "Why are you 
driving so slow." I know and respond, "I've got to stop driving now and get 
my glucose from the trunk."

One other time driving alone on familiar streets I thought it felt remarkably 
like a carnival thrill ride and then I realized, " 'ground control', we have 
a problem."

I get a tired, ancious, don't want to continuing what I'm doing feeling even 
with something as fun as talking with friends. Then I wonder how coeherent 
was my conversation. Before I started testing sugar I'd eat never really 
knowing if it was a reaction. Insulin reactions are like bad dreams, easily 
shaken off "big if" if you know it was a dream.
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