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[IP] Books & Resources (Long)

I just read your post, & wanted to offer some suggestions as far as reading/resources go.  I am 35 years old (DXed at 21) & after initally working hard to be a "good diabetic" :)  I went through a number of years giving it the casual treatment.  It wasn't that I didn't care- it's just that it didn't seem to be giving me much trouble, so I was pretty nonchalant about the whole thing.  I didn't test at all, didn't bother to find out further info. & just took my 2 shots a day as prescribed way back when.  Two years ago I had a diabetic friend & a romantic interest (who is now my husband) team up & give me a MUCH-NEEDED wakeup call...she gave me a meter & supplies & he insisted I see an endocrinologist.  I really believe that between the two of them, they saved my life!  It turned out that I had been experiencing extreme lows (I didn't even realize it, because I was not familiar with the symptoms) & my eyesight was worsening...again, I didn't connect this with the diabetes, not knowing enough to do that.  They made me realize the potential longterm damage I could be doing through my lack of concern, & showed me that working today to prevent complications down the road DOES matter.  (Yes, I admit it- I'm what they call a "Born Again Diabetic"!)
Seriously though...it sounds as though you've had a realization that you need take control of your diabetes...that is WONDERFUL!!!  And now you are at the next step...assembling the tools/resources to face what can be an enormous challenge.  This list is an amazing resource!!  Other ideas are: find out if there is any kind of diabetic support group in your area...or even OUT of your area!  (You may find it well worth the extra travel, to get to share time, ideas, complaints, experiences, etc. with others who are walking the same sometimes scary path...& it can do a LOT to make you realize that you are not "the only one.")  Diabetes can be a lonely disease...don't let yourself deal with it singlehandedly if you can find other options.  Most hospitals/medical facilities offer classes off & on that serve as a sort of "Diabetes 101"...the hospital dietician who counselled me during my pump set-up two months ago advises ALL diabetics (whether they have 2 days or 20 years diabetes experience) to take one of these every year- both as a refresher course in the basics of managing it, & as an opportunity to share your experience with others seeking information.  Check hospitals/clinics/etc. in your area (or further) to see what the opportunities are there! 
I have also found a great deal of help in the books I have listed below. as far as the emotional aspects (dealing with "hating that word") go.  One that provided a kind of mental turning point for me was the first one listed.  The authors offer a "partnership with diabetes" exercize in the first chapter...when I sat down & did that, it made me realize that I had to include "diabetic" as a part of who I was, instead of ignoring it.  Another I highly recommend for emotional support/encouragement is the meditations book.  I learned a lot about myself & how to better work with my disease by reading & really thinking about the stories & ideas therein.
Women & Diabetes  -Laurinda M. Poirer & Katharine M. Coburn
Meditations on Diabetes -Catherine Feste
Caring for the Diabetic Soul - ADA
Psyching Out Diabetes - Richard R. Rubin, June Bierman, & Barbara Toohey
Diabetes: Caring for Your Emotions as well as Your Health - Jerry Edelwich & Archie Brodsky
There are a lot of other great books out there (The Diabetic Woman comes to mind!), & I'm sure others on this list will send you recommendations as well.  Best of luck, & please let us know how it's going...yell for encouragement whenever you need it!
: )