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[IP] Josh

Dear, dear Sylvia:

My heart goes out to you so very much for all you are going through as a
parent...but I want to lighten you up a bit.

We are in a different era now where there are glucose monitors and insulin
pumps, different insulins to choose from, a1c's etc. etc.

Just think of how my parents felt with having two diabetic children, only
beef/pork insulin, testing with urine and blood tests maybe once a week or
once a month.  Also, not knowing what was or wasn't good to eat, not
allowing us to exercise or play, etc. etc.

Josh's body is going to go through lots of changes in his hormones flying
around, in his growing stages, changes in height and weight, activities,
different stress levels at school and at home and so many other factors.

His basals and bolus rates will probably continue to change and so he and
you are just going to have to accept this and you can't keep on falling
apart when he has lows.  If he says he needs to eat something, feels numb,
etc., at least he CAN feel these things and express them to you.  Have him
start carrying around glucose tablets and experiment with them to see how
many he needs to bring him back up.

Diabetes is a roller coaster and never stops going up and down.  You have
good days, bad days and ones in between.  It seems I only get one good week
of b.g. per month and so I go with the flow.  I'm doing all I can and
still......there is no controlling it and you have to learn and Josh has to
learn not to let it control his life either.

Today with all we have, it's much easier to lead a normal life but all the
other stuff is going to keep happening no matter how hard you try to not
make it happen....

The main thing, and I emphasize MAIN here is that he get as good control as
he can so that he may go on a lot longer in life without developing any of
the complications.

With your love and patience and his learning more and more about the disease
and his body, how foods affect his b.g., exercise, stress, etc...he will
grow up to be a handsome young man and he will do just fine :)

Everyone HATES diabetes.  Everyone gets down. Everyone wants it to be me
instead of them...but that's not what real life is about.

Look, my son had a lot of things wrong with him when he was a child.  I
knew, I saw, I got him tested and took care of these things.  I dealt with
the guilt of not knowing did these things happen because of my diabetes?
Could I have done something to change these things?  I drove myself crazy
but you know......

He's learned to accept and overcome all of his obstacles, raduated college
with two engineering degrees, has a wonderful job and is presently working
towards his masters degree....and he developed diabetes two years ago as
well (type II or III no one can tell for sure)......

Please stop killing yourself.  Josh (your son) (mine has the same name), has
diabetes.  Nothing short of a transplant is going to make it go away.  We
all learn to live with it and survive as best we can and we can't have
things perfect no matter how hard we try....just go with the flow Sylvia and
stop driving yourself crazy....

And here's a big hug for you and Josh as well :) :) :)

Kathy Bruckmeyer
email @ redacted
diab 35 yrs pumping 12/00
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