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[IP] depression/diabetes-sorry i's long

I was depressed and didn't realize it - thought it was financial Chapter 13-
thought it was my age/ hysterectomy - thought it was diabetes - thought it
was my realtionship - thought I was a looser. Thought I was a looser because
I wasn't handling everything. Thought I had lost my zest and enthusiasm for
life, and struggled daily with acceptance for a long time. I was never
suicidal either.

Finally I guess I had enough went to my schedules endo appt.  he made some
comment-which of course at that time was negative-I took everything
personally -and to my surprise I started crying uncontrollably and couldn't
stop. They made me stay until I calmed down but still cried all the way home
and most of the night. My endo called me the next day and had made me an
appointment with my M.D. who gave me a temporary rx and referred me for

I am on Celexa now at first I was taking one tablet for about a year and
didn't cry anymore but still wasn't real happy-never felt life was good but
I got through it now.  Went for couseling due to relationship problems and
my Celexa was increased and now I laugh again-love again-even look forward
to doing things around the house again. If they wanted to take my house away
and auction my kids furniture off on my front lawn today I know I would be
okay. I accept the fact that I can't do it all anymore, it doesn't bother me
that much.  At the same time I'm healthy enough to put up a pretty good
fight too. I thank God everyday I am able to show my son how to laugh and
enjoy life. I only wish I had had this help earlier, my 21 year old had to
suffer through my depression and left the house-good for her-looking back at
it.  She's a great kid and smart enough to know she had to get away. Poor
kid had to look at my ugly mug everyday LOL-we laugh a lot together now.  I
still have bad times-still have days when I can't do anything-the difference
now  is I don't struggle with acceptance - I know things will get better and
I even enjoy shut down for a day. My struggles don't destroy me anymore. My
endo doesn't bother me anymore-I think he needs Celexa too-he's such a old
grouch! Dealing, with a disease is hard-the old saying "As long as you have
your health you have everything - how true-and you know what -were the only
ones who know that's true - the healthy people will never understand how
precious good health is-thank God. But we do have a lot more understandings
of life and it's struggles than most-I like that-makes me feel kinda smart

Take Care & God Bless   Carol Teal

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