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Re: [IP] parenting a diabetic parent.

Dear List,
My hubby and I are parenting my diabetic mom and my dad who has severe
parkinson's. She had open heart surgery 3 yrs ago on memorial day week
because of her then uncontrolled diabetes, She should have been on insulin
according to her nephrologist for many years but she was always abused by
the medical doctors when they woudl demean her because of her weigh. She
was 30 pound over weight. They would not help her. Then she was givern a
too high dose of diabeta which never worked for her. Her BGs were very very
high and it led to her vessels becoming so brittle they were like
corkscrews. Thanks to the nephrologist she was put on a good insulin
program til her PCP changed it so a 40/30 at breakfast and before supper.,
her BGs were out of control again as there was nothing to treat the highs
inbetween. I finally had it out with him., The anesthesia she was given
during her heart surgery left her brain injured/damaged even though we told
that doctor mom had problems with anesthestias..our whole family does. But
we were not listened too. and she is not able to remember anything from her
past or 5 minutes ago. It was all wiped out. She spent months in rehab to
re learn things. Her heart surgery was ok but they could not fix all the
needed too as the vessels were too brittle.  We had to re-teach her what
her blood glucose machine was( She thought it was her insulin syringe and
would stick herslef with it in her tummy) She needs help with everything.
We cannot use any sort of punishment type attitudes with mom because what
good does it do. We use positive re-inforcement- positve compliments and
that goes a whole lot farther. We do it out of love because that is the way
parenting should be whether for children or parents.. R was added to her
40/30 protocol and her BGs are doing very well now.  I showed dad the
formula for the sliding scale and he went and got the R and mom was very
co-operative and she was VERY happy to see those  BGs near normal again.
Even with her A1Cs not good her doctor would not change her insulin
protocol. Yesterday mom had an anaphalatic shock and we almost lost her.
She is still in the hospital but she is talking and ready to go home. My
sister has to be there for her insulin because the hosptial seems to forget
my mom is diabteic. They set her up on a dextrsoe IV..she did not have a
low BGs when she went in the ambulance nor when she was in the ER. Her BGs
were 165 2 hours after she ate lunch. Yesterday as the nurse was going to
give mom her BG test and insulin 2 whole hours after she ate supper the
nurse dropped the test strip and the lancet on the floor. The lancet was
already opened. The nurse was going to use it! As much as my mom has no
memory she did know that was not a clean lancet and she spoke up and so did
my sister and both got quite an attitude from that little smart a++++
nurse. who told them it didn't matter if they were dropped. Dad and my sis
are writing everything down and when my mom gets out they will file a
complaint. Mom's BGs were 130 this AM and they are going to be doing her
shots and taking her BGs as they will only take them in the morning and at
supper and she needs it to be taken about 1 PM as she tends to be high then
and she needs a does of R according to sliding scale. The doctor will not
prescribe the R so dad brings it from home because they were told if the
nurses don't see it they can do what they want.

Mom doesn't remember much so my sister was ther bright and early this AM
to be sure mom got her insulin before she ate. It takes someone to be with
a person with diabetes in the hospital especailly when they have a brain
injury. Mom's problem doesnt seem to be her heart thank G-d. She had some
sort of analphyaltic shock.
Once they are home and mom is doing better they will be moving onto a home
on our  property with us so we can help them out. My dad has parkinsons's
really bad so he needs our help.
Thankfully thier little dachshund alerted to the fact something was wrong
with mom..dad was able to call 911..her B/P was almost gone as well as
heart rate. She had been out in the heat working in the yard. Plus the
neighbors had just had thier yards sprayed with  pesticides on both sides
of them and mom apparantly had a very life threatening reaction to them.
So that has been my yesterday and today. Next week we will get things ready
for them to move here  within a few weeks.
I am blessed today to have my mom alive. Anyway..she does alot better with
postivie reinforcement. When I was up there  2 weeks ago I explained in a
kind way what high BGs did to her heart. She understood- follwed my
directions as I wrote them and when I heard a YIPPEEE when her BGS were 120
instead of over 200 I knew we had made a step forward. She was so proud of
herself that she was showing her BG machine readings to everyone which is a
first. She has been so shamed by her medical team that she had been afraid
to let anyone know when she had a high. How sad is that!!!???. Up to now
her doctor has treated her like an old dumb lady and she needed to know she
has self worth and that she isn't dumb. It was the anesthesiologist that
her took away her abilities not her. Once this episode is over the fur will
fly at that place. I will be so happy for them to be patients of my doc..he
will take them thank goodness. And he is a kind compassionate man who knows
what he is doing.
Well I have been a parent to children and now parenting my parents..I soon
will be an expert :)
I had to share..as this is an important topic also.
Ginny- one of the baby boomers who is also one of the sandwhich generation
and happy to be so.
I thank G-d for my parents because of my parents were not there for me when
I was little and sick all the time and were off doing their own thing I
doubt I would be here now. Even now with all I have going on I have the
greatest support system in the world..The love they show us and thier
neighbors is a witness that love works..thier compassion for others and
thier activley working to help others have been a wonderful example for my
life..and the unselfishness they have shown to thier family and to others
is an example of what life is about.  And they have been so blessed...51
yrs of love..a committed relationship that has seen them through thick and
thin...How can one not want to have them in thier lives? They are the
sweetest and funniests people a person could meet..When the day comes for
them to leave this world the world will have lost 2 wonderful people and I
will have lost the 2 people who have always been here for me..and for my
sister whose 45 yr old hubby died 1 1/2 yrs ago..well I think you all see
how I feel about mom and dad :)
email @ redacted
aol IM chat ID riverbijou
ICQ# 48743830

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