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In a message dated 3/7/00 7:23:09 PM Eastern Standard Time, 
email @ redacted writes:

<< Part of a previous post:
 > I bet you don't worry
 > half as much as we do about future complications...and why?
 > Because if it happens to you, you have only one person to
 > blame, yourself.  If it happens to my child,
 > I can only blame me as a caregiver for not having done enough.
 Complications still come down to *the luck of the gene pool.*  I cite the
 identical twins on another list. One did everything wrong and had NO
 complications. The other one followed the rules and had all the
 complications. Go figure. I believe parents who *obsess* are setting
 themselves up to join a new support group later on: GRASP - Guilt-Ridden And
 Suffering Parents. No one wants to be molly-coddled, smothered, nor
 controlled. At some point the child(ren) will have to be given
 self-responsibility and the parents will have to just sit back knowing
 they did their best while they had the chance. Look at all the mother-in-law
 jokes. *Those* m-i-l's have a precious child they cannot give up, too. And,
 remember, hindsight is always 20/20.
 The DM child may very well rebel when on his/her own. That 18th birthday can
 often (not all) mean *freedom* to a teen. I know one who is incarcerated
 right now - got into drugs and all sorts of stuff. He, too, is/was (grown)
 someone's precious child. Parents, don't be so hard on yourself - YOU did
 not choose your child's gene pool. The guilt you may place on your future
 years will not help your offspring then. You could go crazy GRASPing >>
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