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Re: [IP] watch the off-topic postings...Offended Parent

This list seems to have degenerated to a bunch of groveling parents
talking about how hard it is to deal with their childrens diabetes. 

I'd like to see a bit more talk about problems with diabetes care and
problems pertaining to it from DIABETICS. No offense, but to the
non-diabetic, you guys have no idea ;)


I take offense to your remarks.  Personally, I haven't posted much lately, not because I don't want to, but because some incredibly wonderful people had supported me so much when my diabetic child began pumping, that we are very much on our own two feet.  I do however try to skim all the Digests I get and usually find some tidbits that I file for future reference.  If I see a posting from a parent who has questions or concerns about pumping  I e-mail them privately to give them some support (when I can).    If I see a posting from a Diabetic adult, and think that our experience can help them in any way, I will respond to that too if possible.  So many people helped me in the beginning that I want to do the same whenever I can.

If I had seen your posting when I was first dealing with the insecurities of pumping, which makes a blanket statement about grovelling parents who have no idea about Diabetes, I don't think I would have ever posted again.   That would have been a terrific loss for my child. I was one of those parents who shared my successes when things were going right, and reached out when things weren't.  I've made some wonderful friends (both cyber and in person), ended up being supported by people over the phone (long distance) and in turn supporting other people over the phone (long distance), and I feel like I belong in this special place, The Insulin Pumpers Website.  And yes, I made my contribution $$ it is well worth it.

For you to say I, as just a PARENT of a diabetic, have no idea of diabetes and its problems, shows a huge amount of ignorance on your part.  I've dealt with diabetes 24/7, for 8 years now.  Along with parents of diabetics, I have corresponded with adults, some of whom have many of the complications, some of whom have none.  You obviously can't understand the fear that I feel, knowing that my child may someday suffer from complications.  I fought for 10 long months to get a pump for my child hoping the better control will help her beat the damn complications, and marvelling at the change it has made in her life...and ours.  I have no idea about diabetes?  How can I not when I see and hear all it can do to people? We have no problems?  Gee, I should be singing from the rooftops that I am happy it is my child with diabetes and not me.  Give me a break.....I don't understand?  I have no idea?  If I could change places with her........

From this site I have gained so much, from people from all walks of life, all ages, with and without diabetes.  If I see a topic that doesn't pertain to me, I skip it.  Easy to do.
After reading your thoughtless statement, I worry now that some parent who has a question will hesitate to ask it for fear that she/he may be grovelling and taking up space reserved for the diabetic people on the list.  Well, I speak for my diabetic child, and she has received e-mail from wonderful diabetic adults wishing her well.  They obviously don't think what we are going through is trivial compared to their experiences.  In fact most are so supportive it is sometimes humbling.  I thank them all and thank God for Michael who made this a possibility.

We may not always agree on the validity of a certain topic, and it is your right to express your views, so I am expressing mine. I found the statement you made (as pasted above) to be insensitive and it could have some far reaching ill affects.  Parents might be hesitant to ask a question thinking somebody like you might think it is trivial. I certainaly hope that doesn't happen.  So many things we would not have learned if people hadn't asked so many questions.  Do you think where to put the pump while having sex is more important than where to put the pump while a child is at the beach?  I don't.  I think they are important to the person who is asking the question and I hope the responses and postings they receive help solve their problem.

Sorry everybody, for the length, this really hit a cord with me and I decided I was going to post if it killed me!!  I was just too concerned about the repercussions of Jef's statement.  And Jef, I know you are probably not the 'bad guy' you suggest you might sound like, but boy did it raise my hackles.  Now that I have gotten it off my chest, I feel better now....phew

Barb....Erica's mom