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Re: [IP] New Topic - Maintaining Control

I emailed Renee privately but I thought I would share some with the group.

I must have given my mom over 90% of her gray hair and made her age about 30 
years during my teenage years all because I was the nightmare diabetic. I 
NEVER tested. I still have test strips that are from the early 90s. I finally 
spoke up for myself in 2000 (after my 1st year of college) and told my mom and 
 endo i needed a pump vacation. For two years I stayed off the pump. It was
that time that my mom became more and more active with the Lay Review 
 Commitee (with Renee). My boyfriend finally made me see that I needed to take
care of
myself for me and not to shut up my mom or endo. SO I went back on the pump 
this past august. For the first time since i was diagnosed I have had A1Cs 
bellow 9 (i was as high as 17 once). My last A1C was 6.5. It was never that I 
 didn't know how to take care of myself. I could walk into any doctor's office
teach them a thing or two, it was just that I didn't have the motivation. I 
 wanted to be like everyone else. I didn't want to check my blood sugar, I
want to have shots, I didn't want to have diabetes. 

Last summer something clicked inside me and I realized that if I ever wanted 
to start a family I had better start to take care of myself before I get 
 complications (I am complications free and I don't know how). I am several
away from having a family, but I want it to happen more naturally. 

I think that it is important to have family and friends support you no matter 
what your choice is. My Mom bit her tongue and just made sure I had the best 
care (that i would take at least) and that I knew that she loved me besides my 

It is one thing to have the knowledge its another thing to use the knowledge. 
For every person it is something different that will make them use that 
 knowledge. The key is to find it. I don't think that there is a universal

dxd age 7 pumping 1992

In a message dated 7/2/2003 11:11:55 AM Central Daylight Time, 
email @ redacted writes:

> Jef's comments are actually helpful because it corroborates that just 
> "knowing" what one "should" do is a long way from actually DOING it....I 
> guess
> what
> I'm looking for are "true confessions" from all of you who have been in that 
> "can't get yourself motivated to do what would make you feel better", as to 
> you actually GOT PAST that phase......I know it becomes a vicious cycle of 
> lows, rebounds, feeling awful &not wanting to do what's needed, etc....I 
> also 
> know that I struggled with weight loss for decades &have now been a Weight 
> Watchers "lifetimer" for the first time ever for the past 12
> months....basically
> because I FINALLY accepted that there ARE consequences to not doing what's 
> best
> for my overall health....I don't want to wait decades for Review Committee 
> (with Adriana's mom) has "opened my eyes" to TOO MUCH awareness of the 
> ravages 
> of erratic bgs......
> Regards
> Renee (frustrated long-distance pump mom)
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