[Previous Months][Date Index][Thread Index][Join - Register][Login]
[Message Prev][Message Next][Thread Prev][Thread Next]

Re: [IP] bad days with the d

Hang in there!  Maybe you can start again in the morning and set some small
goals!  Dorm food was never easy to avoid pigging out on -- funny, since it is
really pretty awful -- isn't it?

Laura Kiernan wrote:

> today was just one of those days that you want to wipe out of your history
> ... it started great, went to my morning aikido class, had nice 93 bs
> afterwards, ate nice yummy special k and soy milk for breakfast, was 83 pre
> lunch. then for some reason just felt down and out, a little bummed,
> homesick or something. so used that as an excuse to eat two of the evil
> dining hall brownies. then got angry at myself, instead of just looking up
> the carbo amount and giving myself a killer huge bolus to cover did the oh
> so stupid and oh so dangerous practice of letting the sugars run high so
> you end up urinating out all the calories ... then after class went back to
> my dorm room only to find out that i was rejected from a job  i really
> really wanted at this restaurant and then remembered i have a huge spanish
> test tomorrow ... cut class and went for a walk to make myself feel better,
> but already on the shame spiral, bought a peanut butter brownie bar ...
> didn't even check the sugar, didn't bolus ... an hour or two later came to
> my senses and checked, a nasty 345. felt full of guilt and angry at myself,
> sometimes hate this disease so much, but at this point it's not even the
> disease, just hate how i blame it for everything that goes wrong and try to
> eat lots of sugar to get revenge at it or something. thought i was through
> with this phase ... i so want to be.
> down to 200 now, feeling better. there's always tomorrow (when i probably
> won't have any vision or kidney functioning ... no, i can't say that, can't
> have that defeatist attitude)
> thanks for letting me vent, sometimes i just need support from people who
> get it ...
> -laura
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> Insulin-Pumpers website http://www.insulin-pumpers.org/

Insulin-Pumpers website http://www.insulin-pumpers.org/