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RE: [IP] anger and doctors -- a project


At 10:24 AM 12/20/00 -0500, you wrote:
>Lindsey [mailto:email @ redacted] wrote:
> > There is anger towards doctors from diabetics all over the
> > world,
>I'm going to put on a different hat, here.  I am a trained spiritual
>director, and it's that mode that I'm entering here.
>There is a lot of anger about diabetes, period.  I think one of the biggest
>sins of omission on the part of physicians, etc., is the failure to
>recognize the grieving process when one is diagnosed.  Part of the initial
>undertaking should, IMNSHO*, should include some minimum number of sessions
>with a counselor/therapist to help move through the process.

I agree about having sessions to deal with the grieving - Being able to 
find someone who is familiar with diabetes is another story.

I attempted to find out what was available combining counseling/diabetes 
about 15 years ago. There were very few out there...  The American Diabetes 
Association (back then) was planning to create a directory of "counseling 
professionals" as a resource - hasn't happened except for professional 

I talked to Bill Polonsky, PhD. at Joslin who said that the psycho-social 
unit was only created in the early 80s. (He is now in the San Diego area).

Erin Holvey, PhD is affiliated with a large diabetes medical practice in 
the L.A. area (Century Park East) and also teaches at UCLA.

I was lucky in 1999 to find a therapist (intern) who was also an RN and had 
diabetes for about 20 years...

I think that one of the problems with diabetes is that very few are 
unwilling/unable to deal with the feelings that go along with it.... And 
even acknowledging the feelings.

For such a large list, it always amazes me that most of the focus is on the 
"how to".

Feeling related threads die quickly. Is it possible that some are things 
that the "list" finds too sensitive? I have had a lot of progress in not 
getting upset when someone else brings up something that I don't want to 
deal with or reflects something in me that I don't like. Trouble is that it 
usually involves "walking through the fire".

Recently I asked someone what happens when a person attempts to change 
something that they cannot control?... The answer was "you hit the 
wall".   With diabetes it has been easy to "hit the wall" when I have 
unrealistic expectations of what I can really control.

Can I lead a "normal" life with diabetes?  Though I have a good life, it is 
not "normal" by the definition I would like it to be...

Do I fear diabetes?   Approaching peace with it has helped.  When I was 
trying to "WIN" against diabetes there were very few times that I wasn't 
angry at "IT"... and loosing every "battle"...

"Diabetes is a disease of complications and waiting for them to happen."  - 
This is not a way I want to view life.  Though probably not an exact quote, 
this is what I remember MTM saying on national television. (need to find 
the video tape :)

I get frustrated at times when my BGs are not in the range that I want them 
to be.  I don't fear those numbers because they are for me to use as a 
trail-marker of where I am at the moment.  The readings aren't for anyone else.

Some words that I have heard associated with diabetes: anger, fear, 
non-compliant, blame, panic, exhaustion, denial, perfection, rage, 
hopeless, helpless, over-whelmed, sad.   I am sad that there are so few 
places to learn to explore the feelings themselves or the feelings that 
come up around charged words or situations.

Jim S.
email @ redacted


Now stepping down from the pulpit . . . 8-)

>Jim Handsfield
>mailto:email @ redacted OR
>mailto:email @ redacted
>*IMNSHO = In My Not So Humble Opinion
>The opinions expressed are my own and do not necessarily represent those of
>my wife who runs this house and makes more important decisions than I do.
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