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Re: [IP] Update

      I am having a problem with you giving up on your boyfriend so quickly. If
this is a situtition where you and he need to sit down and talk, I would do so
before throwing a relationship away. This goes to show that neither of you are
perfect and together you can work this out. I know now that all seems bleek but
please think very carefully before you do something to effect the rest of your
life. Maybe, hearing about your event really bothered him and his way of
responding was to be defensive. I think he was beyond concerned - he was actually
afraid of what could have happened to you. Trust me - I have been married for 10
yrs. not all perfect - and my hubby has responded the same way with a few
unnecessary comments about how I was not on the ball with my diabetes. Sure, it
was like a kick in the stomach and I felt like who is he to judge me(after all he
ain't perfect <G>). After he had a chance to realize that it was a lesson to be
learned, things had a way of working things out. NOBODY in this big ol' world is
perfect and I think that jumping the gun to say it's over is a bad mistake. You
sweetie is probably also angry with you because you kind of aired your problems
with a bunch of strangers and to top it off you e-mailed to him some "I told you
so letters". Think about how he must have felt. No, I am not perfect actually I am
as far from being perfect as a person can get but don't blow him away that easy. I
think you also owe him an apologize. Please give it a second thought. After all,
it is the season to forgive and forget. I hope it all works out for the best.
Remember, this is my opinion.

Merry Christmas,

Gloria Ross, M.D. wrote:

>                               - - Answer - -
>          December 15, 1998     2:13pm   MAIL IS -
>    FROM: Gloria Ross, M.D.               Private
>      TO: Emily Miggins
> SUBJECT: [IP] Update
> Emily, I am a clinical psychologist who also wears a pump.  If you ever want
> or need to email privately, that's fine. email @ redacted  I admire your
> willingness to confront these issues with honesty.
>                                - - Mail - -
>          December 15, 1998    10:24am   MAIL IS -
>    FROM: Emily Miggins                   Private
>      TO: GLORIAR
> SUBJECT: [IP] Update
> Again,
> Thanks everyone for all the insight and sage counsel.
> I have been with Dan for more than a year, and he has been there for me with
> the diabetes no doubt.  I have thought many a time this is 'the person I am
> going to marry'.  But as many of you have pointed out-- he is scared and wants
> nothing but perfection from me and my disease.
> I picked him up late last night at the airport-- not a word was exchanged.
> He woke up before me this morning and I had forwarded him bits and pieces of
> some of what you all collectively wrote to me about my letter to myself.
> Needless to say he is furious.  He very firmly asked that I stop fwding him
> email from people he does not know.
> Then as we road the train he never spoke to me.  On arriving in the city I ran
> after him to give him a peck on the cheek goodbye.
> He told me "I should listen to the advice of all my emailing friends".  He
> walked away.
> Well. the stress of all this is complete havoc on my system, and its not fair
> to me or him.
> I have to find the courage to let him go-- because I am not going to be his
> version of perfection.  It is impossible for me to promise that I can be
> perfect.  The absolute stress/fear of messing up dooms me to screwing up.
> I simply cannot live under these pressures on top of everything else in daily
> life.
> The worst part of it all is that because I am so wrong in his eyes right now--
> I will never be heard.  Maybe someday.
> Thanks again.  I have laughed and cried at some of your messages regarding
> this whole deal.  I never thought I would dare to forward private thoughts and
> communications like that.  But to tell you the truth it has been a bit of a
> relief.
> 18 years of diabetes and I have never been allowed to burden others with what
> is happening to me, my thoughts, my feelings, my sadness-- my victories.  It
> has been a relief to know I am not alone in my experiences.
> Thank you.
> ReThinking Paper,
> Emily Miggins
> ---------------------------------------------------------- Insulin-Pumpers
> website http://www.insulin-pumpers.org/
> ----------------------------------------------------------
> Insulin-Pumpers website http://www.insulin-pumpers.org/

Insulin-Pumpers website http://www.insulin-pumpers.org/