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Re: [IP] Mental clarity!!!!

David wrote:

These posts have brought up a question I have had for a number of years and
don't really know if there is an answer. My significant other honestly
believes that my lows are personal attacks on her. Her father was an
alcoholic and she relates his coming home drunk with my going low. I have
been able to change her thinking and it really brings me down. I would never
go low on purpose, but I can't seem to make her understand this.

It sounds to me like your significant other has issues of her own that she
would be helped by dealing with.  Sometimes people who live with diabetics
get into a 'blame the victim' mentality (not on purpose) that results in
'what did you do?' marathon quiz session whenever something goes wrong with
the diabetes.  Also, she seems to have a psychological trigger related to
her father's alcoholism that something about you being low trips (maybe how
you look, how you act, the way your eyes squint or go wider, who knows).  If
she will agree to couples counseling, it might be that a counselor can help
both of you understand why she reacts the way she does, help her learn to
handle whatever the triggering event is, and help both of you with skills to
let you fight better (so that neither of you feels like disagreements have
to turn into personal attacks).

I do have sympathy with people who live with diabetics, and problems they
face, but this one seems to be hurting both of you and is the kind of thing
that counseling can really help with.

Just my 2 cents.  Hope it helps.


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