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[IP] Re: IP Stigmatizing

 I wanted to respond since my last message has caused a very interesting
reaction from various people. To recap, I was responding to Kelby about hating
diabetes and letting it stop you from doing what you want. I said that it should
not stop you from doing whatever you want to do but that I do hate it. I also
said, the line that generated such a passionate response, that I am not yet on
the pump because I can't get beyond the stigmatizing aspect of it and could not
pass as a non-diabetic. Now for more detailed what I meant by that.
 Stigmatized is probably not the correct word. It is not that I believe others
would stigmatize me or that I could pass as a diabetic to others. But I can
definitely see that it sounded that way. I guess, what I really mean is that I
personally would feel like I could not pass as nondiabetic to myself. Does that
make sense? There are times when I forget I am diabetic (not for long mind you
but long enough). Like when I am lying in bed on Saturday morning with my
husband and my dog, or when I am taking a nice hot bath, etc. If I had a pump,
there would always be a visual reminder of the diabetes. I am not ready for that
yet. Notice I said yet. I have not made any firm decisions about not going on
the pump; I have only been diagnosed Type 1 for five and a half months. So, hope
that clarifies some of what I meant by the statements.
 Also, I feel some amount of resentment that there seems to be this idea that
you cannot have a healthy pregnancy if you are not on the pump and if you are
thinking about getting pregnant and not going on the pump for the pregnancy then
you are bad, hurting your baby, etc. I feel like these kinds of thoughts and
statements are really similar to the idea that if you have a unexplained high
you are "bad" or if you eat sugar you are "bad." Just that pervasive idea that I
believe people with diabetes have to fight coming from others and their own
internal dialogue. Granted, being pregnant on the pump seems to be much easier
than trying MDI. But I think it is a personal choice. If I am willing to do 11
shots a day to keep my BS in the range they need to be, then that is my choice.
Okay, sorry so sound so soapboxy, but I think that we as a community really need
to be supporting of everyone's choices and not just the choices that we think
people should make.
 That said, I hope everyone is having a great Thursday and I am off to write a
paper about the detrimental effects of child sexual abuse.
Have a great day, Kristen
24 yo, T1 5 months
ttc #1, cycle 1

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