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[IP] Fw: Doctors, Nurses and Gettin Appalachian Medicine



 an oldie,but goodie
Update on:

Hillbilly Medical Terms

Benign........................What you be after you be eight
Bacteria.....................Back door to cafeteria
Barium........................What you do with dead folks
Cesarean Section...A neighborhood in Rome
Catscan......................Searching for the cat
Cauterize..................Make eye contact with her
Colic...........................A sheep dog
Coma...........................A punctuation mark
D&C............................Where Washington is
Dilate.........................To live longer than your kids do
Enema.........................Not a friend
Fester........................Quicker than someone else
Fibula........................A small lie
G.I. Series...............World series of military baseball
Hangnail...................What you hang yur coat on
Impotent....................Distinguished, well known
Labor Pain.................Getting hurt at work
Morbid........................A higher offer than I bid
Nitrates......................Cheaper than day rates
Medical Staff.........A Doctor's cane, sometimes shown with a snake
Node............................I knew it
Outpatient.................A person who has fainted
Pap Smear.................A fatherhood test
Pelvis...........................Second cousin to Elvis
Post Operative.........A letter carrier
Recovery Room.........Place to do upholstery
Secretion...................Hiding something
Tablet.........................A small table to change babies on
Seizure.......................Roman emperor who lived in the Caesarian Section
Terminal Illness......Getting sick at the train station
Tumor..........................More than one
Urine............................Opposite of mine
Varicose.......................Near by

Hospital......................The biggest building in town, other than Joe's
feed warehouse or Frank's lumber mill.
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