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Re: [IP] Mom's reaction about Sherry's pregnancy

--- J Hughey <email @ redacted> wrote:
> Sherry Comptom wrote (in part):
> >>>Am I supposed to feel guilty now for making my
> mom worry so much over this
> "against advice pregnancy"?  How was I supposed to
> know she'd been laboring
> under this idea all these years?  How many people
> has she told that I couldn't
> have children??  How come no one ever told me??? >>>
> Sherry,
> My mind is flooded with thoughts at this, and I'll
> try to sort them out to
> make some semblance of sense.
> A) When my endo suggested I go on a pump (guinea pig
> years - '82) I told him
> it wasn't for me. He said I was just the type of
> DMer they were for. I asked
> Mom why I thought that; she said the dr. who dx'd me
> told us nothing would
> ever help me. That dr. was wrong. Thanks to my endo,
> he gave me hope - perhaps
> another dr. who wasn't interested in pumps would
> have never given me hope -
> keeping me in my *death by 35* mindset. It was
> reversed. You had no control
> over the *advice* the dr. or anyone gave your mom.
> B) YOU have nothing to do with your mom's guilt
> feelings. You are pg - even
> though accidental - and many, many, many of us have
> been and had successful
> deliveries. You will see that instead, you will make
> your mom proud of you.
> Just watch her cuddle that babyzilla!
> C) You could not know she was laboring (pardon the
> pun) under this idea all
> these years. We never know what's in someone else's
> mind. As a kid, I *KNEW*
> ladies' heels went into the high heels of their
> shoes  -
> I didn't need to ask because I knew it. My hugsband
> knew ladies' legs went all
> the way up to their necks - he didn't have to ask
> because he knew it. A
> neighborman thought ladies' legs ended at their
> hemline. He didn't have to
> ask, because he knew it. I'll bet there are lots of
> other stupid
> thoughts/assumptions on this list and with a tad of
> education we learn the
> truth. Your mom is learning the truth through YOU.
> Don't be guilty, be proud!
> D) If your sil is jealous of you having the
> firstborn g'baby, she'll get over
> it - if not, that's HER problem. There's isn't one
> thing she can do about it.
> I was *looked down on* for having a girl first, then
> a boy. "Everyone else has
> a boy first." (HA!)  We can't control or change
> others' views - just do our
> best for what we have and what we know.
> E) How many people has she told over these years
> that you couldn't have
> children? Who knows? Who cares? They will all see
> you CAN have children. How
> many people have drs told that pumps do not work -
> or worse yet (and I've
> heard this) pumps KILL people! They are wrong, too.
> One thing stressed on this
> list is dispelling rumors and false *facts* about
> DM. You are a walking
> (bulging) teacher. ;)  IF you are the subject of
> *over-the-fence* talk that
> you couldn't/shouldn't have children, then, like
> Darrin, you will be proof
> that it is possible. Of course, his is that pumps DO
> work. ;)  We don't know
> how many friends/relatives/others that the ones who
> will hear about *you* that
> this will help. I heard MANY stories as a kid about
> *my aunt had DM, she had
> both legs cut off but she's dead now.* I'd rather be
> the success story they
> are talking about. That's you in this case!
> F) How come no one ever told you?  Why should they?
> They didn't want to worry
> you and leave you with hope. I would have rather
> have lived with hope than
> with my *death sentence* I had been led to believe.
> If they had told you,
> would that have prevented this pregnancy? What would
> it have changed? They
> didn't tell you (for which *I* think you should be
> grateful - but I don't
> count) and you are pregnant and pretty soon you'll
> be attending graduation for
> Teen-zilla! Probably with other zillas accompanying
> you. They were wrong. You
> are pg. You are going to be successful.
> This is my 15c worth. Just chalk all these feelings
> up to pg hormones. The
> best to you, dear. And keep us updated. We care!
> (~_^)
> Jan (61 y/o, T-1 11/5/50, pmpg 8/23/83) & Bluda Sue
> (MM507C 3/99)
> http://maxpages.com/bludasue AND
> http://www.picturetrail.com/dmBASHpics
> (including an album of the EVOLUTION OF PUMPS)
> A man convinced against his will is of the same
> opinion still.
had an unplanned pregnancy. My husband and I had been
told I couldn't have children. We adopted 2 and
surprise I got pregnant. It was a high risk pregnancy
and I was told I shouldn't go thru pregnancy. I felt
this child was meant to be. I wish I could say all
turned out well, but it didn't. My son has learning
disabilities. Every day I am sorry he has to suffer
because as hard as I tried and still try I am hard to
control. I'm not saying don't get pregnant, but plan
and get under control before trying. Then do your best
to keep under control. The first couple months are
crucial for the baby. I wouldn't give my son up for
anything as I love him without conditions.
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