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Re: [IP] Vent Over Due(long)

    Thank you for being honest & trusting enough to share such personal 
feelings with the IP-ers. Your post was very timely, considering that I'd 
received a phone call from a despondent mom yesterday, seeking reassurance 
from me that her 9 yr old daughter wasn't "possessed". We touched upon almost 
every aspect of your post, particularly the point that a child with diabetes 
(assuming they're compliant) will never again experience "spontaneity" in the 
same way. For some children, the impact is minimal, but for more sensitive 
children, the "sting" (bad pun) is deeper & longer-lasting. Yes, the pump 
enables them to "do" what their peers are doing, but the mental "foreplay" 
necessitated takes away some of the joy of the experience....and the 
relentlessness can be very hard for a young child to accept. This particular 
mom was frightened by her child's tantrums & "wishing she were dead" rantings 
etc until I told her we too had "been there, done that"...and all I had done 
was hold Melissa, mutter "I know" ( which of course I truly don't) & allow 
her to "vent", instead of telling her how grateful she should be that she 
didn't have cancer, etc. etc. 
   And now, like you, Melissa too feels "different" than her peers - which 
isn't necessarily a "bad" thing, but her view of life has been so skewed by 
growing up with intensive self-management of her diabetes. For the adults in 
IP whose diabetes care pre-dated the early 90s, give Brian and my daughter & 
the other children whose parents posts here the consideration that your 
experience and theirs was/is very different. For many of these children, 
checking 6-8 times/day, taking extra shots (bolus) to "correct" a high 
because of the availability of Humalog, etc. has made their control 
"tighter", but it has also made their experience very different from those 
who grew up less "aware"with urine tests and 1 or 2 shots per day. For an 
adult to know that they have the means to monitor themselves is very 
different than for a child whose emotional, mental & psychological maturity 
haven't all meshed yet to be able to appreciate that ability. Instead of it 
being a "g-d send" as it must be for those who grew up in the pre-meter era, 
for a child, it's a double-edged sword - "can't live without it/ wish I 
didn't ALWAYS have to live with it!" A child in the 2001 JDRF Children's 
Congress delegate book described diabetes poignantly as being like a "friend 
who NEVER leaves your side even when you're sick of him, always always being 
there, tagging along everywhere for everything". It's a "damned if you 
do/damned if you don't" scenario. 
    My 18 yr old daughter is extremely responsible, but I think she's also 
weary of "mothering" her friends because everyone just assumes she's so 
competent, and she's also weary of always having to "do the right thing". 
Such is her lot in life, & both she and I consider ourselves fortunate that 
at least she was already 9 years old at diagnosis, as opposed to the alarming 
#s of 2 and 3 yrs old being diagnosed of late. Nonetheless, it's cathartic to 
unburden oneself occasionally, so thank you again Brian for braving these 
waters, knowing that you're sure to hear opposing views from some IPers too. 
For me, the thank-you note e-mailed to me today from that mom, who slept 
better knowing that others had "survived" what she's now facing, makes all of 
our tales worth sharing.
Regards, Renee (Melissa's pump-mom, waxing philosophical today)
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