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[IP] depression and diabetes (some sex stuff too - stay away if offended)

Tracey and all  -
First of all, this is coming from a 25 year old as well, so I can say I feel
some of your pain.  :)  Life with diabetes, let's be blunt here, can be one
hell of a pain in our butts.  We have to deal with physical and emotional
problems, rude people, uncaring family members, dumb medical staff
(sometimes), number-crunching insurance companies, etc. etc.  It's hectic,
and can be plain old STRESSFUL.   I cannot tell you all how many times I
have broken down in tears that I can't find a reason for, or how many times
I have wanted to shout to the world how much I wish I didn't have diabetes.

I also realize that I am the one who controls what (mostly) happens with my
life and my health.  You have been proactive, Tracey - you took the step
forward and got a pump.  Now you need the support to feel comfortable with
it, and you must educate yourself on how to use it.  I don't know if anyone
remembers, but George Carlin once said 'Life...is a series of dogs.'  My
life....is a series of diabetes.  Every little thing we learn, every word of
support, every step we take, is something going forward to a better life.
Everybody experiences odd feelings at times, the pump was a little weird for
me at first, and going to what you said about relationships, well.....I
asked my hubby today if it bothered him that I wear my pump during sex and
don't disconnect from it.  He said 'Well, it's a part of YOU.  Why would it
bother me?' This brought tears to my eyes; he sees it as simply another body
part, he thinks its great, and it doesn't bother him in the least.  To tell
the truth I had always been wanting to know what he thought.  Then he said
'You know, it's no big deal.  If it gets in the way, we just stop, and I
move it. I know I'm not going to hurt you or your site,  we've stopped
before for other things, so why would your pump make anything we do
different?'  I've said before to the list that I never knew freedom came
with a tether - apparently Scott feels the same way.  But the dynamics are
different in every relationship -  after all we can't compare apples to
oranges - perhaps your partner is uncomfortable with it, is maybe scared of
it, etc.  Perhaps he/she needs some education about it to make them at ease
with it.  If that's not what's bothering them, perhaps its time to find
someone who is willing to go through the learning process with you.

As for your comfort factor in wearing the pump, some of us have no problems
with it.  I let my tubing hang out, I let people see what it is - some
people don't like to, and that's cool too.  It can always be worn inside
your clothing - tucked in a bra, tucked in panties, tucked in a leg or arm
strap, tucked in a sock, or simply clipped to the inside of your waistband.
I wear clothing with lots of roomy pockets - cargo shorts, overalls, baggy
jeans - and the pump slips nicely into many of the pockets - and thanks to
the clear tubing no one ever has to know I'm using one if I choose to hide

I do also have to add that talking to a counselor about your feelings may be
in order.  Depression is not always easily dealt with.  I've been able to
work myself thru my bouts with depression, but I would not hesitate to seek
medical advice if I couldn't.  You also have a great support group in this
list.  I wish you the best of luck, Tracey, and to anyone else who is having
problems at this time - I certainly hope you come upon better times soon.
:)  Anyone who'd like can always e-mail me privately, as always......
Dawn email @ redacted

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