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Re: [IP] Depression and Diabetes

> I am constantly in the hospital, by my own 
> doing, but no one can force you to take 
> insulin......
> Has anyone been this depressed before......
I have... but only for... oh... FIVE YEARS... hell more
than that really.  It's a self-perpetuating downward
spiral.  You look at your broken body and get depressed,
when you get depressed you start to care less whether or
not you live or die.  Even if you care enough that you
WANT to live long enough to see the next Olympics, you'd
like to do it without insulin reactions so you take less
insulin anyway.  Which drives your BGs up.  When slows
down your brain even more, making you more depressed,
making you take less insulin and do fewer checks.  At my
worst I was down to about one check a week and about as
often on the shots.

I'd get hospitalized for DKA, put on an IV drip for a
few days, get told to take my shots, and be sent on my
way.  The only good thing about it being a few days off
of work, and the worlds fastest and easiest weight loss
diet known to man. (I've yoyoed by as much as 40 pounds
over a 3 month span on several occasions).

It's a HARD cycle of depression and suicide to get out
of (yes, I know it's not taking the barrel in your
mouth, but it's still killing yourself).  I wish I had a
fix-all answer to give you but I don't.  For me, it took
having my vision go from 20/20 to having to sit three
feet from the 36" TV WITH my glasses on to wake me up
(interrestingly in the voice of my Nebraskan

Just know that a lot of us here have been where you are
now.  Many of us, myself included, still visit that
place from time to time.

You're not alone.

-Sara G.

> i mean i know the pump is supposed to help, 
> but it's embarrassing for me to wear one, 
> it hurts the romance in a relationship, and 
> it's just a big pain in the butt to have on 
> all the time......
> i wear mine whenever my father is around.......

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