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[IP] reflections of being single and diabetic

On Tue, 04 Apr 2000 "daniel blakeley" <email @ redacted>

>I'm single as of 12/98 and am troubled by some mental health issues with 
>single and diabetic. First of all I had to face the fact that I would be
>living alone, well I did it and now don't worry about it much anymore. The
>pump helps with the auto-shutdown timer on it.

>There is another thing I'm struggling with now and that is how do you get 
>a relationship with someone when you know that you might be a real burden on
>them someday, I'm not saying that diabetes is the worse thing you can have 
>i'm not putting down anyone, but to face the truth diabetes is no cake walk
>and does put a strain on everyone especially the people that are married to a

Dan: I'm sending this to you personally and to the list as there are many 
single people on the list (anywhere from the kids to the teenagers and up) who 
if they aren't already hitting this question will at some point.

I was diagnosed in Nov '61 at two years old.  Never really remembering pre-D 
days, and having gone through loss of vision (which I recovered through use of 
the pump, diet, prayer and G-ds blessing) and some nuerapthy, I had been told 
that getting married would be 'a waste of a woman's life' as there wasn't much 
hope in a future (of any sort) for me.

I know when I decided to start looking for a wife and get married it was not 
an easy subject.  I was told not to tell the woman until after 'n' dates, I 
was told to hide it until much later, etc.

I decided that honesty would be best.  My wife and I were introduced by a 
pediatrician who explained to her (before he ever introduced us) that my long 
term prospects due to diabetes were questionable but that I could get a number 
of 'good' years in first.

I think that being on a pump changes the entire picture that has been painted.
 While the pump doesn't prevent diabetic related damage I think if you survey 
those of us who have been on the longest (I'm 20 years this June) the above 
garbage that was fed to me and prospectives was out of place.

Yes, I have had lows, passouts, gastroparesis and other not-so-much fun 
secondary complications but thank G-d I'm living a full life, holding down a 
full time job (and a half) and helping raise a family.

Realize that you HAVE a full life ahead of you: it is what you make it.

((Sorry to be so long winded and twisted and out of the ordinary for myself 
but this letter really caught me)).

Feel free to write back privately if you want to 'talk' or need ideas/council.

Yerachmiel Altman

 This message sent to you from the desk of
  Yerachmiel Bruchya haLevi Altman's computer.

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