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Re: [IP] Grief
In a message dated 04/30/1999 8:38:50 AM Central Daylight Time,
email @ redacted writes:
<< I agree with Kathleen that grief upon diagnosis of DM, whether in
yourself, or your child, is a very strong and real emotion. And it is
not resolved particularly quickly, either. >>
The diagnosis of diabetes forces a person into immediate action. They are
almost forced into not being allowed to grieve. It's not so much time as it
is stages a person should go through.
I once had a wonderful therapist explain to me that a chronic illness should
be grieved as a death. There are certain stages that a person should go
through completely before they finally get to the acceptance stage. Any
good book about death and grieving explain these. I'm sure there are more,
but anger, denial, feeling sorry for oneself (why me?) are all things we must
go through. The trick, according to therapists, is to work through each
stage completely so that we don't get stuck in a certain stage and never get
to the point of healthy acceptance.
I think there is something to this. It took me 20 years to finally get to
the point of healthy acceptance of the diabetes because I wouldn't 'allow'
myself to feel certain ways thinking it wasn't "right". I was stuck in
denial. Once I worked through all the emotions that people should go through
I finally woke up and really started living. That was over 11 years ago.
A little over a year ago my world was shattered by a little slip on the ice
that changed my life. I will never be able to walk, run or stand like I have
in the past. By working through my grief I accept the fact that my life has
changed. It doesn't mean that I like it, just that some of life's little
pleasures are a bit more challenging.
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